Corrupt a wish

Granted, The zomibies eat everyone, coursing an apocalypse.

I wish it was the weekend.

Granted, but your schedule shifts with the temporal shift, meaning you still have to do all the things you otherwise would've.

I wish that they would make a Magnus, Robot Fighter movie.

Granted, it sucks and you are forever disappointed.

I wish I could get back into the Brawl scene.

Granted, but everyone else has now left the Brawl scene.

I wish television shows didn't suck so much.

(That's pretty much what's happened anyway lol)

Granted, it now blows...up. You die.

I wish I was famous

Granted, but someone winds up assassinating you for no discernible reason.

I wish J.Lo's butt was bigger.

Granted, it's so big, it causes the earth to lose orbit and spiral into the sun.

I wish I had a cape.

Granted, but you look gay in it.

I wish they hadn't taken my favorite "Pants on the Ground" remix off of YouTube. Also, I wish YouTube wasn't such a bunch of faggots about everything.

Granted, everyone becomes so posh on there, it turns into a pay to view business and you can't afford it

I wish I could sleep.

Granted, but now all of your dreams involve vampire clowns trying to rape you and your friends and family at the same time.

I wish I was nigh omnipotent.

Granted, but your impotent aswell.

I wish I was asleep now, Seriously, this is silly now.

Granted, but all of a sudden Jason Statham rings your doorbell, waking you up, and then kicks the door down onto your face when you go to see who it is.

I wish I knew why Jason Statham would do that, since unlike in The Transporter, Smudge did not try to kill him by blowing his car up.

Granted, but because you know, he now has to kill you.

I wish I wasn't so tired.

Granted, but the rest of the world is asleep and you stay awake for days on end

I wish that research papers were easier

Granted, they are so easy no-one takes them seriously

I wish I had a clone that I could control remotely.

Granted. However, he turns evil, destroys the remote and kills you.

I wish I could teach the world to sing in perfect harmony.

They sing Rawk is a faggot, till the end of time.

I wish I was Pete Holmes

Granted, but I don't know who it is, so I turn you into Pete Burns instead.

I wish I had a better song.

You make a better song, but it's so annoying you kill yourself

I wish I ran this bitch.

Granted, but then you are quickly taken over by deer*

I wish Alice in Wonderland was out in theaters

Granted. However, the only part of the film shown is a 10 second clip.

I wish I had my own theme song.

Granted, but it's very annoying, and it's so loud that you can't enjoy other music anymore either because the lousy director inserts music into every "scene".

I wish I was Deadpool.

Granted, but Ironman comes along and destroys you

I wish there was a flash movie

Granted, but they made Flash the gay lover of his son from the future, and most of the movie is just about their incestuous affair instead of about superheroics or morality or anything else.

I wish no one would hurt anyone else.

Granted, but we get attacked by a hostile alien race

I wish i could find better personas