Corrupt a wish

Granted, you have to take lessons of ME! Mwahahahaa

I wish I could freeze time.

Granted, we all get frozen solid too! (thanks for that!)

I wish I could do a backflip

Granted, you can never stop backflipping for the rest of your life.

I wish I could dance.

Granted, you're dancing starts a worlwide conga line adn no-one can ever stop, eventually wiping out of existance

I wish I had a job.

Granted, you can never leave it to even sleep, eat or drink.

I wish everyone would just get along.

Granted but the lack of conflict causes humanity to stop developing and becomes stagnant.

I wish I could start a big fight

lol smudge ya knob, my last post was I wish i could SPELL, I miss spelled it to heighten the irony

I thought you misspelt sleep, no idea why :p

You get bottled and die

I wish I could just kick someone in the head

Granted it's your own

I wish for more Diedrich Bader in Bones

Granted, he's the only think in it, just starring emptily at you.

I wish I won on Monopoly Hot Property

Granted. However, just as you win, you explode.

I wish I had less homework.

Granted you have to do more school work

I wish for a run of 15 wins

Granted, they're all just lucky and everyone is still aware you have no skill in winning whatever.

I wish I wish I was a fish.

Granted, you are caught, gutted and cooked

I wish for a penalty miss

Granted, But the ref dismisses the first one and the retake goes in

I wish for more people to join My Smash Society

Granted, but all of them are lame and think you suck, and all the good members that join are driven off and away from gaming by the others.

I wish there was a text dump of OoT available that separated the quotes into who said what.

Granted but you had to compile it in the dark, using a lamp that you had to keep treking for hours on end to refill

I wish I'd chosen presentation graphics in stead of Word

Granted. The grapics are...well, put it this way, they're graphic.

I wish I had something funny to say.

Granted ... but if offends the Muslims

I wish for awesome gaming skills

Granted. You're now awesome at Chicken Shoot for DS.

I wish I didn't feel so ill.

Granted, time is a great healer but it does make you older.

I wish there was more going on here

Granted , but you're not involved.

I wish i was batman.

Granted. You're not the superhero however, just an 80 year old man obsessed with bats.

I wish I had no work to do.

Granted, now you just lie around all day completely immobilized with others feeding and cleaning you.

I wish everyone wasn't so stupid all the time.

Granted, we are unbelieveably stupid a lot of the time

I wish I could make my mind up

Granted, it now looks very pretty in all its make-up.
Or, granted, but you made the wrong decision and mildly regret it.

I wish I could understand why I like Metroid Prime 2 better than Metroid Prime when almost everyone else feels the opposite way.